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Tim Allen [1953-0] American

Rank: 101
Comedian, Actor

Timothy Allen Dick, known professionally as Tim Allen, is an American actor, comedian, and author.
He is known for his role as Tim "The Toolman" Taylor in the ABC television show Home Improvement as well as for his starring roles in several films, including Disney's The Santa Clause trilogy, Disney/Pixar's Toy Story trilogy, Wild Hogs, and Galaxy Quest.

Women, Car, Marriage, Mom, Positive, Best, Dad, Dating, Experience, Friendship, Funny, Humor, Men, Parenting, Respect, Trust

Quote	Tags	Rank
Dad needs to show an incredible amount of respect and humor and friendship toward his mate so the kids understand their parents are sexy, they're fun, they do things together, they're best friends. Kids learn by example. If I respect Mom, they're going to respect Mom.	Best, Dad, Friendship, Humor, Mom, Parenting, Respect	101
Electricity can be dangerous. My nephew tried to stick a penny into a plug. Whoever said a penny doesn't go far didn't see him shoot across that floor. I told him he was grounded.		102
Women are like cars: we all want a Ferrari, sometimes want a pickup truck, and end up with a station wagon.	Dating, Women	103
I'm an algebra liar. I figure two good lies make a positive.	Positive	104
I have to get a licence to drive a motorcycle to protect myself and the people around me. I am adamant there should be some sort of licensing required to have children.		105
I'm a creative guy, artistically with graphics.		106
I like Pixie Sticks. Yeah, screw the middle man. Just a tube of sugar... I'd pour two of those in a big 12 ounce coke. And I'd go out to catechism class and try to concentrate on the priest. I saw Jesus several times. I swear I did.		107
Men are liars. We'll lie about lying if we have to. I'm an algebra liar. I figure two good lies make a positive.	Funny, Positive	108
My mom said the only reason men are alive is for lawn care and vehicle maintenance.	Men, Mom	109
Women now have choices. They can be married, not married, have a job, not have a job, be married with children, unmarried with children. Men have the same choice we've always had: work, or prison.	Women	110
In the last three years of racing I've met as many women fans as men fans, and in NASCAR it's the same thing. My wife loves cars, but the difference is she doesn't have 20 years of understanding the background of them. She basically drives them and uses her gut feelings as to which is best.	Car, Women	111
The world's a mean place. It's unfair, then it's fair. It's hateful, then it's loving. It's a very peculiar place on philosophical and metaphysical and religious levels.		112
I was gone so much in my first marriage. I love the moments when I engage with my youngest daughter now. It's not my thing to sit on the ground and play tea party, but I'll do it because it's a moment that will stick with me forever.	Marriage	113
I think women like Ferraris. A Ferrari is everybody's car.	Car	114
I have a thing for tools.		115
In my experience, it's all wonderful with girls until about 16. Around that time, boys kind of calm down and start focusing their testosterone. Girls get a little challenging, especially for fathers.	Experience	116
I don't understand why it has to be either - or - either socialism or democracy. Why can't we combine things to get the best of each system?		117
I do a lot of family shows.		118
You don't know what people are really like until they're under a lot of stress.		119
I love doing logos. I've been a graphic artist all my life.		120
Comedy is the ultimate anarchist.		121
While awaiting sentencing, I decided to give stand-up comedy a shot. The judge had suggested I get my act together, and I took him seriously.		122
When somebody tells you they're not very smart, they're saying exactly the opposite.		123
In marriage, compromise nurtures the relationship.	Marriage	124
I have irrational fears, and they all go back to losing my father as a kid. I've never gotten over it.		125
My wife loves cars, but the difference is she doesn't have 20 years of understanding the background of them. She basically drives them and uses her gut feelings as to which is best.		126
Never comment on a woman's rear end. Never use the words 'large' or 'size' with 'rear end.' Never. Avoid the area altogether. Trust me.	Trust	201
Men are pigs. Too bad we own everything.		202
I have an only child. She's so independent and good with adults.		203
The big advantage to playing the Venetian in Las Vegas - where it's a beautiful theater - is that unlike other places, even many other nice venues, I can do a set and lighting cues, I can put on a real show. I can dress up, wear a tux.		204
Nothing's as easy as it is on a sitcom. Issues that we take care of in 20 minutes on the show can stretch out over years in real families.		205
It's true; I have a skill and it's... it has not related to acting, it's not related to auditions, it's not related to studios, not related to public whim. It's whether I'm funny or not and whether I can entertain people.		206
For years, I just did not like this idea of God, church.		207

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