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Bernie Mac [1958-2008] American

Rank: 101
Actor, Comedian

Bernard Jeffrey "Bernie" McCullough better known by his stage name Bernie Mac, was an American comedian, actor and voice artist. Born and raised on Chicago's south side, Mac gained popularity as a stand-up comedian. He joined fellow comedians Steve Harvey, Cedric the Entertainer, and D. L. Hughley in The Original Kings of Comedy.
After briefly hosting the HBO show Midnight Mac, Mac appeared in several films in smaller roles. His most noted film role was as Frank Catton in the remake Ocean's Eleven and the title character of Mr. 3000.

Humor, Chance, Cool, Fear, Food, Funny, Home, Hope, Mom, Parenting, Success, Wedding

Quote	Tags	Rank
People like rumors. They're going to say things like, 'You was at the club with Lil' Kim, and you and Kanye West got into a fist fight.' You can't get upset. You've got to keep hope alive.	Hope	101
I always wanted to scuba dive. I used to scuba dive undercover like black Aquaman.		102
Jerry Weintraub, the producer, might be a pain in the ass, but he really knows how to treat his actors.		103
I'm not a star, and I don't want to be a star. Stars fall. I'm an ordinary guy with an extraordinary job.		104
If I can tell someone a story that makes them bend over and laugh, that's bigger than anything else.		105
There's no success story. Everybody's got a ghetto story. You always want to make it bigger than what it is.	Success	106
I can't build myself by beating somebody down.		107
When you're offstage, that's the footprint. That's the man God's gonna judge.		108
I love my daughter, but there's a certain feeling, a certain emotion when you got a granddaughter, you know?		109
I can act. I've been acting for a long time, but like anything else, don't nobody owe you nothing. You've go to pay your dues. You go from A to Z; you don't go from M to Z.		110
I get facials. I get a manicure and pedicure every week. I get my hair cut, and I oil myself down from head to toe. I got that from my brother. I was so impressed with how high maintenance he was. When he left the room, you could still smell him for an hour.		111
When I get a chance to play golf or go on a boat with good people, take the boat out and put some lobsters on the grill, get the ice-cold beer and the cigars - that's heaven here on earth.	Chance	112
Bernie Mac just says what you think but are afraid to say.		113
I'm looking for laughs, you know? If it take me to flip over a table, if I have to go physical comedy, I will do it. But whatever the joke needs at that particular time, is where I'm dedicated to. I'm not into beating somebody down and beating myself up. I don't do insults and things like that. I don't do it - I'm a storyteller.		114
I don't have no story. Everybody wants this Hollywood story, but the world don't owe you nothing, man. It's what you owe the world.		115
I learned hard lessons in life; I had to because I had so much happen: My mother died my sophomore year in high school. The next year, same day, my brother dropped dead. Two years after that, I got married because my girlfriend got pregnant. The year after my wedding, my father - who I had only recently met - died.	Wedding	116
Only way you can you get upset is when you expecting something.		117
You don't see me in Los Angeles a lot. I go back home. Because I can't play the game. I can't - my tolerance - I know I'm getting old; I'll be 50 this year. And you know how I know I'm getting old? 'Cause my tolerance level is low.	Home	118
When I started in the clubs, I had to work places where didn't nobody else want to work. I had to do clubs where street gangs were, had to do motorcycle gangs, gay balls and things of that nature.		119
It was rough being dark. I got heat from my own people more than anyone else. I remember going to my mom and saying, 'Why am I so black?' And she said, 'Because I'm black. You just gotta always work harder than the average bear.'	Mom	120
As I got older, I got into all kinds of things in the streets - but for some reason, I never got caught up with the gangs growing up. Everybody dug me, man. I never had problems.		121
I love who I am. I love what I've become.		122
I want to play a villain - I can't wait to play a villain.		123
Fear is not one of my attributes.	Fear	124
Every time you see a black romance, it's over-the-top. There always has to be extreme hostility between the sexes. He has to cheat. She has to show him how independently strong she is, not just as a woman but as a black woman.		125
I have Glocks, .45s, Berettas, Remingtons. I like the marksmanship and the discipline that it takes to be a gun owner. I like the machinery. Being able to take it out and clean it is even more fascinating than having the gun.		126
I'm funny. I'm a comedian. I'm not a clown.	Funny	201
I want to have fun. Life ain't no dress rehearsal. I want to have fun. I'm a comedian; I ain't no politician. So everything I do is with humor, with love.	Humor	202
You know you poor when you eatin' breakfast food late. You fryin' toast? At nine o'clock at night? With bacon? You're broke.	Food	203
That's the whole key to anything: Don't be afraid to fail. And Bernie Mac is not afraid to fail.		204
Black audiences are hard. They always think they're better than you. So you got to come with a little extra to satisfy them.		205
My name is Bernard Jeffrey McCullough, but people know me as Bernie Mac. My mama, God rest her soul - she used to call me Beanie. Used to say, 'Don't you worry about Beanie. Beanie gonna be just fine. Beanie gonna surprise everyone.'		206
Stand-up is what I am; stand-up is what made me.		207
We're so politically correct; we take things so seriously.		208
The success of my comedy has been not being afraid to touch on subject matters or issues that everyone else is politically scared of.		209
Bernie Mac don't sugarcoat.		210
I don't care about how I look; I'm dedicated to the laughs. You know, I used to be a clown, so - my name was Smoothie the Clown. All the training I had, all my training is geared toward making people laugh, and I didn't care about being cool.	Cool	211
I became the storyteller of South Side Chicago. I used an old Kiwi liquid shoe polish as a microphone. I'd go around the house interviewing everybody, telling stupid jokes, doing voices. I mimicked Sidney Poitier, Sammy Davis Jr., people on 'Laugh-In,' Flip Wilson.		212
When I hit my 20s, I struggled to make it. I got married at 19, and my daughter, Je'Niece, was born a year later. I worked blue collar jobs during the day and comedy clubs at night, and I was earning about $25 a year doing stand-up.		213
You know, every time it comes, every time that light comes on or every time that camera comes on, every time that microphone comes on, the Mac Man seek and destroy.		214
I want to do something that people can really say, 'Hey, man, that was good, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of that.' 'Pride' and 'Transformers' and things like that.		215
I've always been a reserved cat. When I play sports, there's people used to get mad at me because I didn't hang out and things like that. I've never been that kind of person. Nothing has changed in that regard. I've never been posse, and all that. I'm a quiet storm.		216
I hate to let people down. I was like that in sports and I was like that in comedy. I was like that at work. When I worked General Motors and stuff like that, when I say something, I mean it.		217
Like a lot of black people, I grew up straight po'. Wasn't no question about whether we was po', either. If you really wanted to know, all you had to do was look in our refrigerator.		218
I was born October 5, 1957, on the South Side of Chicago, in the Woodlawn area, a neighborhood that hasn't changed much in forty-five years. Our house was on 66th and Blackstone, but the city tore it down when the rats took over.		219
I came from a place where there wasn't a lot of joy.		220
I was good at keeping my mother from crying.		221
I'm so black, I leave fingerprints on coal.		222
My grandmother always told me how you start is how you finish.		223
I'm an ordinary guy with an extraordinary job.		224
Whatever success I've had, I always like to top it.		225
My comedy comes from pain. I can't stand to see someone hurting.		226
I was in love with a lot of people, because I was a student of the game of comedy - Carol Burnett, Jack Benny, Red Skelton, Jackie Gleason, Don Rickles, Red Foxx, Moms Mabley - who gets no credit, Richard Pryor, Bill Cosby, George Kirby. I loved them all, and I used to just take a page out of all of them.		301
Why I was so intrigued with Red Skelton was because he was able to make you cry and laugh and the same time. That was power.		302
I've introduced myself with comedy, and once you've introduced yourself as something, that's where people keep you. That's where people like to hold you.		303
I want people to say at the end of my day, you know, like I used to say about Sidney Poitier and James Cagney and Joan Crawford and Red Skelton and those guys and Bill Cosby. They did quality and substance. You always remember them.		304
I hate to compare anything, especially while I'm promoting. I feel that's another disrespect, but 'Ocean's 13' is the best movie I've ever done in my life. No question.		305
I don't need to pat myself on the back until my arm breaks. I don't need any of that.		306
I'm not ashamed to tell the truth about what happened in my family. I think that's what makes my comedy different.		307
I think a lot of TV insults the audience.		308
I was a street performer for two years.		309
I want to speak directly to the audience, to say, 'I'm like you - I'm frustrated, I'm not an expert, I don't have a manual on parenting, I make mistakes, I'm selfish too.'	Parenting	310
Bernie Mac is relentless. That's one thing I like about him. He's not PC. He doesn't care what you think. He's going out there to please that audience.		311
My humor had changed from foolishness to making sense.	Humor	312
I don't think the people wanna see me play Clyde Johnson the architect.		313
My daughter was a beautiful child.		314
I've never been no superficial cat.		315
I don't ever watch myself. By watching, you try to perfect yourself, become a robot.		316
I know doing movies is where I need to be. That's where my audience wants to see me.		317
It's a pleasure to work with someone who is just as strong as you are.		318
You can't be a doctor if you don't know the entire parts of the body.		319
I'm a big fan of TV.		320
You're never going to see me playing a buffoon.		321
Comedy has been so good to me.		322
The one thing about comedy, making it become a part of you, the audience loves it, because you become part of them.		323
When I go onstage, I want to relieve your mind, your pressures.		324
I've been in training for stardom.		325
Bernie Mac is talented!		326
Bernie Mac is happy.		401
I ain't running for office. I ain't running for nothing.		402
The two sides of Bernie - that's a quiet weapon that I have.		403
Why do people love Richard Pryor so much? 'Cause he had problems.		404
My girlfriend Rhonda, who's now my wife, I graduated from high school, she got pregnant. My grandfather said, 'You've got to do the right thing.'		405
I came up in the community center. I used to be physical director of the South Central Community Center in Chicago on 83rd. It's still there. It used to be around there when I was a kid.		406
My family are police officers, detectives. My brother Mitch is FBI. Mitch is like that - a stern enforcer.		407
I have so much respect for what's funny.		408

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