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Ogden Nash - To My Valentine
Work rating: High

	More than a catbird hates a cat,
	Or a criminal hates a clue,
	Or the Axis hates the United States,
	That`s how much I love you.

	I love you more than a duck can swim,
	And more than a grapefruit squirts,
	I love you more than a gin rummy is a bore,
	And more than a toothache hurts.

	As a shipwrecked sailor hates the sea,
	Or a juggler hates a shove,
	As a hostess detests unexpected guests,
	That`s how much you I love.

	I love you more than a wasp can sting,
	And more than the subway jerks,
	I love you as much as a beggar needs a crutch,
	And more than a hangnail irks.

	I swear to you by the stars above,
	And below, if such there be,
	As the High Court loathes perjurious oathes,
	That`s how you`re loved by me.
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