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Robert W Service - Toilet SeatsRobert W Service - Toilet Seats
Work rating: Medium


While I am emulating Keats My brother fabrics toilet seats, The which, they say, are works of art, Aesthetic features of the mart; So exquisitely are they made With plastic of a pastel shade, Of topaz, ivory or rose, Inviting to serene repose. Rajahs I`m told have seats of gold,— (They must, I fear, be very cold). But Tom`s have thermostatic heat, With sympathy your grace to greet. Like silver they are neon lit, Making a halo as you sit: Then lo! they play with dulset tone A melody by Mendelssohn. Oh were I lyrical as Yeats I would not sing of toilet seats, But rather serenade a star,— Yet I must take things as they are. For even kings must coyly own Them as essential as a throne: So as I tug the Muse`s teats I envy Tom his toilet seats.
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