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Paul Laurence Dunbar - De Critters` Dance
Work rating: Low

Ain`t nobody nevah tol` you not a wo`d a-tall,
  `Bout de time dat all de critters gin dey fancy ball?
  Some folks tell it in a sto`y, some folks sing de rhyme,
  `Peahs to me you ought to hyeahed it, case hit `s ol` ez time.

  Well, de critters all was p`osp`ous, now would be de chance
  Fu` to tease ol` Pa`son Hedgehog, givin` of a dance;
  Case, you know, de critters` preachah was de stric`est kin`,
  An` he nevah made no `lowance fu` de frisky min`.

  So dey sont dey inbitations, Raccoon writ `em all,
  "Dis hyeah note is to inbite you to de Fancy Ball;
  Come erlong an` bring yo` ladies, bring yo` chillun too,
  Put on all yo` bibs an` tuckahs, show whut you kin do."

  W`en de night come, dey all gathahed in a place dey knowed,
  Fu` enough erway f`om people, nigh enough de road,
  All de critters had ersponded, Hop-Toad up to Baih,
  An` I `s hyeah to tell you, Pa`son Hedgehog too, was daih.

  Well, dey talked an` made dey `bejunce, des lak critters do,
  An` dey walked an` p`omenaded `roun` an` thoo an` thoo;
  Jealous ol` Mis` Fox, she whispah, "See Mis` Wildcat daih,
  Ain`t hit scan`lous, huh a-comin` wid huh shouldahs baih?"

  Ol` man T`utle was n`t honin` fu` no dancin` tricks,
  So he stayed by ol` Mis` Tu`tle, talkin` politics;
  Den de ban` hit `mence a-playin` critters all to place,
  Fou` ercross an` fou` stan` sideways, smilin` face to face.

  `Fessah Frog, he play de co`net, Cricket play de fife,
  Slews o` Grasshoppahs a-fiddlin` lak to save dey life;
  Mistah Crow, `he call de figgers, settin` in a tree,
  Huh, uh! how dose critters sasshayed was a sight to see.

  Mistah Possom swing Mis` Rabbit up an` down de flo`,
  Ol` man Baih, he ain`t so nimble, an` it mek him blow;
  Raccoon dancin` wid Mis` Squ`il squeeze huh little han`,
  She say, "Oh, now ain`t you awful, quit it, goodness lan`!"

  Pa`son Hedgehog groanin` awful at his converts` shines,
  `Dough he peepin` thoo his fingahs at dem movin` lines,
  `Twell he cain`t set still no longah w`en de fiddles sing,
  Up he jump, an` bless you, honey, cut de pigeon-wing.

  Well, de critters lak to fainted jes` wid dey su`prise.
  Sistah Fox, she vowed she was n`t gwine to b`lieve huh eyes;
  But dey could n`t be no `sputin` `bout it any mo`:
  Pa`son Hedgehog was a-cape`in` all erroun` de flo.`

  Den dey all jes` capahed scan`lous case dey did n`t doubt,
  Dat dey still could go to meetin`; who could tu`n `em out?
  So wid dancin` an` uligion, dey was in de fol`,
  Fu` a-dancin` wid de Pa`son couldn`t hu`t de soul.
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