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William Brighty Rands - Little Ditties I
Work rating: Medium

Winifred Waters sat and sighed
         Under a weeping willow; 
     When she went to bed she cried, 
         Wetting all the pillow; 

     Kept on crying night and day, 
         Till her friends lost patience; 
     "What shall we do to stop her, pray?" 
         So said her relations. 

     Send her to the sandy plains, 
       In the zone called torrid: 
   Send her where it never rains, 
       Where the heat is horrid. 

   Mind that she has only flour 
       For her daily feeding; 
   Let her have a page an hour 
       Of the driest reading,— 

   Navigation, logarithm, 
       All that kind of knowledge,— 
   Ancient pedigrees go with `em, 
       From the Heralds` College. 

   When the poor girl has endured 
       Six months of this drying, 
   Winifred will come back cured, 
       Let us hope, of crying. 

   Then she will not day by day 
       Make those mournful faces, 
   And we shall not have to say, 
       "Wring her pillow-cases."
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