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William Henry Drummond - The Fox Hunt
Work rating: Low

I`m all bus` up, for a mont` or two,
    On account of de wife I got,
  Wit` de fuss an` troublesome t`ing she do,
    She`s makin` me sick a lot;
  An` I`m sorry dat woman was go to school
    For larnin` de way to read,
  Her fader an` moder is great beeg fool
    For geevin` her more she need!

  `Cos now it`s a paper ev`ry week,
    Dollar a year, no less--
  Plaintee o` talkin` about musique,
    An` tell you de way to dress;
  Of course dat`s makin` her try to sing
    An` dress, till it`s easy see
  She`s goin` crazy about de t`ing
    Dey`re callin`--Societee.

  Las` week, no sooner I come along
    From market of Bonsecour,
  Dan I’m seein` right off, dere`s somet`ing wrong,
    For she`s stannin` outside de door
  Smilin` so sweetly upon de face,
    Lookin` so nice an` gay--
  Anywan t`ink it`s purty sure case
    She marry me yesterday.

  Can`t wait a minute till supper`s t`roo
    Before she commence to go--
  "Oh! Johnnie, dere`s somet`ing I mus` tole you--
    Somet`ing you lak to know--
  To-morrow we`re goin` for drive aroun`
    An` it won`t be de heavy load,
  Jus` me an` you, for to see dem houn`
    T`row off on de Bord à Plouffe road."

  "Denise, if dat was de grande affaire
    On w`at you call à la mode--
  Lookin` dem fox dog stannin` dere
    T`row off on de Bord à Plouffe road,
  You can count me out!"  An` she start to cry--
    "You know very well," she say,
  "I don`t mean dat--may I never die
    But you`re a beeg fool to-day!

  "Johnnie, to-morrow you`ll come wit` me
    Watchin` dem run de race,
  Ketchin` de fox--if you don`t, you see
    We`re bote on de beeg disgrace.
  Dey`re all comin` out from de reever side,
    An` over from Beaurepaire,
  Seein` de folk from de city ride,
    An` ev`rywan`s sure be dere."

  All right--an` to-morrow dere`s two new shoe,
    So de leetle horse mak` de show,
  Out wit` de buggy: de new wan too,
    Only get her ten year ago--
  An` dere on de road, you should see de gang
    Of folk from aroun` de place,
  Billy Dufresne, an` ole Champagne,
    Comin` to see de race,

  Wit` plaintee of stranger I never see,
    An` some of dem from Pointe Claire,
  All of dem bringin` de familee,
    W`enever dere`s room to spare.
  Wonderful sight--I’m sure you say--
    To see how Societee
  (W`atever dat mean?) she got de way
    Of foolin` de w`ole contree.

  Den I`m heetchin` de horse on de fence, for fear
    Somebody run away,
  So man wit` de bugle he`s comin` near,
    An` dis is de t`ing he say--
  "You see any fox to-day, ma frien`,
    Runnin` aroun` at all,
  You know any place he got hees den?
    For we lak it to mak` de call."

  An` me--I tell heem, "You mus` be wrong,
    An` surely don`t want to kill
  De leetle red fox, about two foot long,
    Dat`s leevin` below de hill;
  Jompin` de horse till he break hees knee,
    Wile spotty dog mak` de row,
  For a five-dollar fox? You can`t fool me--
    I know w`at you`re wantin` now!

  "You hear de story of ole Belair,
    He`s seein` de silver fox
  W`enever he`s feeshin` de reever dere,
    Sneakin` along de rocks."
  But ma wife get madder I never see,
    An` say, "Wall! you _mus`_ be green--
  Shut up right away," she`s tellin` me,
    "It`s de leetle red fox he mean!"

  So me--I say not`ing, but watch de fun---
    An` spotty dog smell aroun`
  Till dey start to yell, an` quick as a gun
    Ev`rywan`s yellin`, "Foun`!"
  An` de way dey`re goin` across de fiel`,
    De lady in front, before,
  Dunno, but I’m willin` to bet good deal
    Somebody mus` be sore!

  Over de fence dey`re jompin` now,
    Too busy for see de gate
  Stannin` wide open, an` den dey plough
    Along at a terrible rate;
  All for de small red fox, dey say,
    Only de leetle fox,
  You`re buyin` for five dollar any day,
    An` put heem on two-foot box.

  I`m foolish enough, but not lak dat--
    Never lak dat at all,
  Sam` as you see a crazy cat
    Tryin` to climb de wall;
  So I say to ma wife, I’m satisfy
    On ev`ryt`ing I was see,
  But happy an` glad, until I die,
    I`m not on Societee!

  Losin` a day on de fall`s no joke,
    Dat`s w`at I`m tellin` you,
  Jus` for de pleasure of see dem folk
    Dress up on de howdy do;
  So I’m sorry you go to school,
    Larnin` de readin` dere--
  Could do it mese`f, an` play de fool,
    If money I got to spare.

  But potatoes a dollar a bag,
    An` easy to sell de load,
  Watchin` de houn` to see heem wag
    Hees tail, on de Bord à Plouffe road
  Foolin` away w`en de market’s good
    For seein` Societee
  Chasin` de leetle fox t`roo de wood
    Wit` crazy folk!--no siree!
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