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C J Dennis - The Fortunes of Grandison Lee
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Now Percival Gregory Grandison-Lee
   He came of a fine old stock.
His sire was an eminent K.C.B,
But Percival never appeared to be
   A chip off that shrewd old block.
In spite of the strain
He was weak of brain,
   Though a jolly good fellow was he.
And, to tell the truth,
In his gilded youth
   His manner of living was free.


Now Percival`s father, the elder Lee,
   Aspired to the House of Lords;
So he earnestly sought for the £ s. d.
Becoming a prominent guinea-pig, he
   Was chairman of numerous Boards.
But the game was rash,
And there came a smash,
   And he perished of felo-de-se.
And up to his neck,
In the subsequent wreck
   Was Percival Grandison-Lee.


So Percy resigned from the King`s armee;
   He couldn`t maintain the style.
And, after a harrowing period, he
Was faced by the spectre of bank-rupt-cee,
   His schedule he had to file.
He smiled through court
   Like a hardy sport,
   But he sorrowed in privacee;
For an easy job
For a hard-up nob
   Isn`t growing on every tree.


He touched then for tenners so frequentlee
   That the friends of Lee, deceased,
A length procession of loans could see,
And they whispered to one of the Ministree
   As Percival`s plans increased.
Thus they shipped him off
As a gilded toff
   On the staff of a high grandee
To earn his bread
As a figurehead -
   And a Governor`s A.D.C.


In that country of democrats o`er the sea
   The cream of Society`s cream
They worship a feathered and frilled grandee,
And e`er on his gorgeous A.D.C.
   The "nicest" are ready to beam.
His boots were tight,
And his hat was bright,
   And his tie was a fantasee;
And the wealthiest girls -
Society`s pearls -
   Just loved his refulgency.


He strolled in the wake of the high grandee
   In his glittering uniform;
At frivols and functions and afternoon tea
He lolled with a manner so easy and free
   That he took the girls by storm.
And he wooed a maid
Of the sheep brigade,
   One of the squatocracee,
With a station Outback
And a house at Toorak,
   And they wedded right merrilee.


Now Percival Gregory Grandison-Lee
   In his London club doth dwell;
He squats at his ease through a deputee
That idle and valueless absentee,
   And says that this land is Hell;
But once every year
For the Cup he`s here,
   As the master of Bungabaree;
Our well-equipped courses
And galloping horses
   Are all that appeal to Lee.
Source
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