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C J Dennis - War Song
Work rating: Medium

Sing a song o` Hempire
   Mother`s took a fit,
Nasty Germans buildin` ships,
   An` never mentioned it.
Buildin` beastly warships,
   Quite a tidy few;
Mother`s got an awful start
   Baby`s got it too.

The King was in the Customs House,
   But couldn`t find a penny ;
The Lords were at their country seats
   And didn`t offer any;
A millyun paupers mooned about
   With nothin` much to eat,
When down comes Australyer
   With a Dreadnought fer the fleet.
Sing a song o` Warships,
   `Orrid ole Bulow,
Layin` down `is Dreadnoughts
   An` didn`t let us know -
Didn`t advertise it,
   Till the Cablegram
Spread the awful tidings
   An` the Empire shouted, "Damn!"

Sing a song o` Hempire,
   Mother`s up a tree;
But the Melbourne Stock exchange
   `As swore to set `er free.
Does the German caitiff
   Build upon the sly?
Then seventeen suburban may`rs
   Will know the reason why!

Seventeen suburban may`rs
   Of the Bulldog Breed
Fly to succor Hingland
   In her hour of need.
What of "Constant Reader"?
   "Pro Bono Publico"?
Will "Subscriber" see old Hingland
   Flabbergasted?  No!!

A reeiy, trooly battleship,
   With guns an` things galore,
And splendid sails of calico
   From MacMillan`s store -
The Stock Exchange will float it
   On a sea of gush.
Wot`s two millyun quid to us?
   We don`t care a rush!

(But - whisper - little mother,
   If, later on, some day,
We want ter sorter float a loan,
   To `elp us on our way-
Borrer of it back, like -
   After wot `as passed,
Don`t you go an` crool our pitch,
   Like you did the last.)

Sing a song o` Britain`s fleet
  (`Ow the Tories raged!)
That`s goin` to guard Australyer
   (If not otherwise engaged).
Sing of `Umpty Dumpty -
   `Im that `ad the fall.
Rob Australian Peter
   To pay old Hinglish Paul.

Sing o` topsy-turvey;
   Sing of inside-out,
Of back-to-front and upside-down
   An` t`other way about.
Spend ten bloomin` millyun,
   Buy yer ships galore,
An` send them all to Hingland
   To guard Australyer`s shore.

Sing a song o` Hempire!
   We`ve got ter guard "the heart."
If it gets a limb lopped off,
   That ain`t a vital part.
Learn ter think Imperially
   Shriek with courage grim
Fer "the heart" must be protected - 
   Tho` it`s tough if we`re the limb.
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