---

C J Dennis - A Post-Cup Tale
Work rating: Low

I`ad the money in me `and!
Fair dinkum!  Right there, by the stand.
    I tole me wife at breakfus` time,
    Straight out: "Trivalve," I sez "is prime.
Trivalve," I sez.  An`, all the week,
I swear ther`s no one `eard me speak
    Another `orse`s name.  Why, look,
    I `ad the oil straight from a Book
On Sund`y at me cousin`s place
When we was torkin` of the race.
    "Trivalve," `e sez.  "`Is chance is grand."
    I `ad the money in me `and!

Fair in me `and I `ad the dough!
An` then a man `as got to go -
    Wot?  Tough?  Look, if I `adn`t met
    Jim Smith (I ain`t forgave `im yet)
`E takes an` grabs me be the coat.
"Trivalve?" `e sez.  "Ar, turn it up!
`Ow could `e win a flamin`Cup?"
    Of course, I thort `e muster knoo.
    `Im livin` near a trainer, too.

Right `ere, like that, fair in me fist
I `ad the notes!  An` then I missed -
    Missed like a mug fair on the knock
Becos `is maggin` done me block.
"That airy goat?" `e sez.  "E`s crook!"
Fair knocked me back, `e did.  An` look,
    I `ad the money in me `and!
    Fair in me paw!  An`, un`erstand,
Sixes at least I coulder got -
Thirty to five, an` made a pot.
Today I mighter been reel rich -
    Rollin` in dough!  Instid o` which,
`Ere`s me - Aw!  Don`t it beat the band?
I `AD THE MONEY IN ME `AND!
    Put me clean off, that`s wot `e did…
    Say, could yeh len` us `arf a quid?
Source
The script ran 0.004 seconds.