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Edwin Arlington Robinson - Captain CraigEdwin Arlington Robinson - Captain Craig
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I I doubt if ten men in all Tilbury Town   Had ever shaken hands with Captain Craig,   Or called him by his name, or looked at him   So curiously, or so concernedly,   As they had looked at ashes; but a few— Say five or six of us—had found somehow   The spark in him, and we had fanned it there,   Choked under, like a jest in Holy Writ,   By Tilbury prudence. He had lived his life   And in his way had shared, with all mankind, Inveterate leave to fashion of himself,   By some resplendent metamorphosis,   Whatever he was not. And after time,   When it had come sufficiently to pass   That he was going patch-clad through the streets, Weak, dizzy, chilled, and half starved, he had laid   Some nerveless fingers on a prudent sleeve,   And told the sleeve, in furtive confidence,   Just how it was: “My name is Captain Craig,”   He said, “and I must eat.” The sleeve moved on, And after it moved others—one or two;   For Captain Craig, before the day was done,   Got back to the scant refuge of his bed   And shivered into it without a curse—   Without a murmur even. He was cold, And old, and hungry; but the worst of it   Was a forlorn familiar consciousness   That he had failed again. There was a time   When he had fancied, if worst came to worst,   And he could do no more, that he might ask Of whom he would. But once had been enough,   And soon there would be nothing more to ask.   He was himself, and he had lost the speed   He started with, and he was left behind.   There was no mystery, no tragedy; And if they found him lying on his back   Stone dead there some sharp morning, as they might,—   Well, once upon a time there was a man—   Es war einmal ein König, if it pleased him.   And he was right: there were no men to blame: There was just a false note in the Tilbury tune—   A note that able-bodied men might sound   Hosannas on while Captain Craig lay quiet.   They might have made him sing by feeding him   Till he should march again, but probably Such yielding would have jeopardized the rhythm;   They found it more melodious to shout   Right on, with unmolested adoration,   To keep the tune as it had always been,   To trust in God, and let the Captain starve.   He must have understood that afterwards—   When we had laid some fuel to the spark   Of him, and oxidized it—for he laughed   Out loud and long at us to feel it burn,   And then, for gratitude, made game of us: “You are the resurrection and the life,”   He said, “and I the hymn the Brahmin sings;   O Fuscus! and we’ll go no more a-roving.”   We were not quite accoutred for a blast   Of any lettered nonchalance like that, And some of us—the five or six of us   Who found him out—were singularly struck.   But soon there came assurance of his lips,   Like phrases out of some sweet instrument   Man’s hand had never fitted, that he felt “No penitential shame for what had come,   No virtuous regret for what had been,—   But rather a joy to find it in his life   To be an outcast usher of the soul   For such as had good courage of the Sun To pattern Love.” The Captain had one chair;   And on the bottom of it, like a king,   For longer time than I dare chronicle,   Sat with an ancient ease and eulogized   His opportunity. My friends got out, Like brokers out of Arcady; but I—   May be for fascination of the thing,   Or may be for the larger humor of it—   Stayed listening, unwearied and unstung.   When they were gone the Captain’s tuneful ooze Of rhetoric took on a change; he smiled   At me and then continued, earnestly:   “Your friends have had enough of it; but you,   For a motive hardly vindicated yet   By prudence or by conscience, have remained; And that is very good, for I have things   To tell you: things that are not words alone—   Which are the ghosts of things—but something firmer.   “First, would I have you know, for every gift   Or sacrifice, there are—or there may be— Two kinds of gratitude: the sudden kind   We feel for what we take, the larger kind   We feel for what we give. Once we have learned   As much as this, we know the truth has been   Told over to the world a thousand times;— But we have had no ears to listen yet   For more than fragments of it: we have heard   A murmur now and then, and echo here   And there, and we have made great music of it;   And we have made innumerable books To please the Unknown God. Time throws away   Dead thousands of them, but the God that knows   No death denies not one: the books all count,   The songs all count; and yet God’s music has   No modes, his language has no adjectives.”   “You may be right, you may be wrong,” said I;   “But what has this that you are saying now—   This nineteenth-century Nirvana-talk—   To do with you and me?” The Captain raised   His hand and held it westward, where a patched And unwashed attic-window filtered in   What barren light could reach us, and then said,   With a suave, complacent resonance: “There shines   The sun. Behold it. We go round and round,   And wisdom comes to us with every whirl We count throughout the circuit. We may say   The child is born, the boy becomes a man,   The man does this and that, and the man goes,—   But having said it we have not said much,   Not very much. Do I fancy, or you think, That it will be the end of anything   When I am gone? There was a soldier once   Who fought one fight and in that fight fell dead.   Sad friends went after, and they brought him home   And had a brass band at his funeral, As you should have at mine; and after that   A few remembered him. But he was dead,   They said, and they should have their friend no more.—   However, there was once a starveling child—   A ragged-vested little incubus, Born to be cuffed and frighted out of all   Capacity for childhood’s happiness—   Who started out one day, quite suddenly,   To drown himself. He ran away from home,   Across the clover-fields and through the woods, And waited on a rock above a stream,   Just like a kingfisher. He might have dived,   Or jumped, or he might not; but anyhow,   There came along a man who looked at him   With such an unexpected friendliness, And talked with him in such a common way,   That life grew marvelously different:   What he had lately known for sullen trunks   And branches, and a world of tedious leaves,   Was all transmuted; a faint forest wind That once had made the loneliest of all   Sad sounds on earth, made now the rarest music;   And water that had called him once to death   Now seemed a flowing glory. And that man,   Born to go down a soldier, did this thing. Not much to do? Not very much, I grant you:   Good occupation for a sonneteer,   Or for a clown, or for a clergyman,   But small work for a soldier. By the way,   When you are weary sometimes of your own Utility, I wonder if you find   Occasional great comfort pondering   What power a man has in him to put forth?   ‘Of all the many marvelous things that are,   Nothing is there more marvelous than man,’ Said Sophocles; and he lived long ago;   ‘And earth, unending ancient of the gods   He furrows; and the ploughs go back and forth,   Turning the broken mould, year after year.’…     “I turned a little furrow of my own Once on a time, and everybody laughed—   As I laughed afterwards; and I doubt not   The First Intelligence, which we have drawn   In our competitive humility   As if it went forever on two legs, Had some diversion of it: I believe   God’s humor is the music of the spheres—   But even as we draft omnipotence   Itself to our own image, we pervert   The courage of an infinite ideal To finite resignation. You have made   The cement of your churches out of tears   And ashes, and the fabric will not stand:   The shifted walls that you have coaxed and shored   So long with unavailing compromise Will crumble down to dust and blow away,   And younger dust will follow after them;   Though not the faintest or the farthest whirled   First atom of the least that ever flew   Shall be by man defrauded of the touch God thrilled it with to make a dream for man   When Science was unborn. And after time,   When we have earned our spiritual ears,   And art’s commiseration of the truth   No longer glorifies the singing beast, Or venerates the clinquant charlatan,—   Then shall at last come ringing through the sun,   Through time, through flesh, a music that is true.   For wisdom is that music, and all joy   That wisdom:—you may counterfeit, you think, The burden of it in a thousand ways;   But as the bitterness that loads your tears   Makes Dead Sea swimming easy, so the gloom,   The penance, and the woeful pride you keep,   Make bitterness your buoyance of the world. And at the fairest and the frenziedest   Alike of your God-fearing festivals,   You so compound the truth to pamper fear   That in the doubtful surfeit of your faith   You clamor for the food that shadows eat. You call it rapture or deliverance,—   Passion or exaltation, or what most   The moment needs, but your faint-heartedness   Lives in it yet: you quiver and you clutch   For something larger, something unfulfilled, Some wiser kind of joy that you shall have   Never, until you learn to laugh with God.”   And with a calm Socratic patronage,   At once half sombre and half humorous,   The Captain reverently twirled his thumbs And fixed his eyes on something far away;   Then, with a gradual gaze, conclusive, shrewd,   And at the moment unendurable   For sheer beneficence, he looked at me.     “But the brass band?” I said, not quite at ease With altruism yet.—He made a sort   Of reminiscent little inward noise,   Midway between a chuckle and a laugh,   And that was all his answer: not a word   Of explanation or suggestion came From those tight-smiling lips. And when I left,   I wondered, as I trod the creaking snow   And had the world-wide air to breathe again,—   Though I had seen the tremor of his mouth   And honored the endurance of his hand— Whether or not, securely closeted   Up there in the stived haven of his den,   The man sat laughing at me; and I felt   My teeth grind hard together with a quaint   Revulsion—as I recognize it now— Not only for my Captain, but as well   For every smug-faced failure on God’s earth;   Albeit I could swear, at the same time,   That there were tears in the old fellow’s eyes.   I question if in tremors or in tears There be more guidance to man’s worthiness   Than—well, say in his prayers. But oftentimes   It humors us to think that we possess   By some divine adjustment of our own   Particular shrewd cells, or something else, What others, for untutored sympathy,   Go spirit-fishing more than half their lives   To catch—like cheerful sinners to catch faith;   And I have not a doubt but I assumed   Some egotistic attribute like this When, cautiously, next morning I reduced   The fretful qualms of my novitiate,   For most part, to an undigested pride.   Only, I live convinced that I regret   This enterprise no more than I regret My life; and I am glad that I was born.     That evening, at “The Chrysalis,” I found   The faces of my comrades all suffused   With what I chose then to denominate   Superfluous good feeling. In return, They loaded me with titles of odd form   And unexemplified significance,   Like “Bellows-mender to Prince Æolus,”   “Pipe-filler to the Hoboscholiast,”   “Bread-fruit for the Non-Doing,” with one more That I remember, and a dozen more   That I forget. I may have been disturbed,   I do not say that I was not annoyed,   But something of the same serenity   That fortified me later made me feel For their skin-pricking arrows not so much   Of pain as of a vigorous defect   In this world’s archery. I might have tried,   With a flat facetiousness, to demonstrate   What they had only snapped at and thereby Made out of my best evidence no more   Than comfortable food for their conceit;   But patient wisdom frowned on argument,   With a side nod for silence, and I smoked   A series of incurable dry pipes While Morgan fiddled, with obnoxious care,   Things that I wished he wouldn’t. Killigrew,   Drowsed with a fond abstraction, like an ass,   Lay blinking at me while he grinned and made   Remarks. The learned Plunket made remarks.   It may have been for smoke that I cursed cats   That night, but I have rather to believe   As I lay turning, twisting, listening,   And wondering, between great sleepless yawns,   What possible satisfaction those dead leaves Could find in sending shadows to my room   And swinging them like black rags on a line,   That I, with a forlorn clear-headedness   Was ekeing out probation. I had sinned   In fearing to believe what I believed, And I was paying for it.—Whimsical,   You think,—factitious; but “there is no luck,   No fate, no fortune for us, but the old   Unswerving and inviolable price   Gets paid: God sells himself eternally, But never gives a crust,” my friend had said;   And while I watched those leaves, and heard those cats,   And with half mad minuteness analyzed   The Captain’s attitude and then my own,   I felt at length as one who throws himself Down restless on a couch when clouds are dark,   And shuts his eyes to find, when he wakes up   And opens them again, what seems at first   An unfamiliar sunlight in his room   And in his life—as if the child in him Had laughed and let him see; and then I knew   Some prowling superfluity of child   In me had found the child in Captain Craig   And let the sunlight reach him. While I slept,   My thought reshaped itself to friendly dreams, And in the morning it was with me still.     Through March and shifting April to the time   When winter first becomes a memory   My friend the Captain—to my other friend’s   Incredulous regret that such as he Should ever get the talons of his talk   So fixed in my unfledged credulity—   Kept up the peroration of his life,   Not yielding at a threshold, nor, I think,   Too often on the stairs. He made me laugh Sometimes, and then again he made me weep   Almost; for I had insufficiency   Enough in me to make me know the truth   Within the jest, and I could feel it there   As well as if it were the folded note I felt between my fingers. I had said   Before that I should have to go away   And leave him for the season; and his eyes   Had shone with well-becoming interest   At that intelligence. There was no mist In them that I remember; but I marked   An unmistakable self-questioning   And a reticence of unassumed regret.   The two together made anxiety—   Not selfishness, I ventured. I should see No more of him for six or seven months,   And I was there to tell him as I might   What humorous provision we had made   For keeping him locked up in Tilbury Town.   That finished—with a few more commonplace Prosaics on the certified event   Of my return to find him young again—   I left him neither vexed, I thought, with us,   Nor over much at odds with destiny.   At any rate, save always for a look That I had seen too often to mistake   Or to forget, he gave no other sign.     That train began to move; and as it moved,   I felt a comfortable sudden change   All over and inside. Partly it seemed As if the strings of me had all at once   Gone down a tone or two; and even though   It made me scowl to think so trivial   A touch had owned the strength to tighten them,   It made me laugh to think that I was free. But free from what—when I began to turn   The question round—was more than I could say:   I was no longer vexed with Killigrew,   Nor more was I possessed with Captain Craig;   But I was eased of some restraint, I thought, Not qualified by those amenities,   And I should have to search the matter down;   For I was young, and I was very keen.   So I began to smoke a bad cigar   That Plunket, in his love, had given me The night before; and as I smoked I watched   The flying mirrors for a mile or so,   Till to the changing glimpse, now sharp, now faint,   They gave me of the woodland over west,   A gleam of long-forgotten strenuous years Came back, when we were Red Men on the trail,   With Morgan for the big chief Wocky-Bocky;   And yawning out of that I set myself   To face again the loud monotonous ride   That lay before me like a vista drawn Of bag-racks to the fabled end of things.
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