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Edgar Guest - When The Minister Calls
Work rating: Low

My Paw says that it used to be,
Whenever the minister came for tea,
`At they sat up straight in their chairs at night
An` put all their common things out o` sight,
An` nobody cracked a joke or grinned,
But they talked o` the way that people sinned,
An` the burnin` fires that would cook you sure
When you came to die, if you wasn`t pure--
Such a gloomy affair it used to be
Whenever the minister came for tea.

But now when the minister comes to call
I get him out for a game of ball,
And you`d never know if you`d see him bat,
Without any coat or vest or hat,
That he is a minister, no, siree!
He looks like a regular man to me.
An` he knows just how to go down to the dirt
For the grounders hot without gettin` hurt--
An` when they call us, both him an` me
Have to git washed up again for tea.

Our minister says if you`ll just play fair
You`ll be fit for heaven or anywhere;
An` fun`s all right if your hands are clean
An` you never cheat an` you don`t get mean.
He says that he never has understood
Why a feller can`t play an` still be good.
An` my Paw says that he`s just the kind
Of a minister that he likes to find--
So I`m always tickled as I can be
Whenever our minister comes for tea.
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