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Edgar Guest - What Ma Said
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When Pa came home last night he had a package in his hand,
Now Ma," said he, "I`ve something here which you will say is grand. 
A friend of mine got home today from hunting in the woods, 
He`s been away a week or two, and got back with the goods. 
He had a corking string of birds, I wish you could have seen `em!"
"If you`ve brought any partridge home," said Ma, "you`ll have to clean `em."

"Now listen, Ma," said Pa to her, "these birds are mighty rare.
I know a lot of men who`d pay a heap to get a pair. 
But it`s against the law to sell this splendid sort of game,
And if you bought `em you would have to use a different name.
It isn`t every couple has a pair to eat between `em." 
"If you got any partridge there," says Ma, "you`ll have to clean `em."

"Whenever kings want something fine, it`s partridge that they eat,
And millionaires prefer `em, too, to every sort of meat. 
About us everywhere tonight are folks who`d think it fine 
If on a brace of partridge they could just sit down to dine. 
They`ve got a turkey skinned to death, they`re sweeter than a chicken."
"If that`s what you`ve brought home," says Ma, "you`ll have to do the pickin`."

And then Pa took the paper off and showed Ma what he had, 
"There, look at those two beauties, don`t they start you feelin` glad?
An` ain`t your mouth a-waterin` to think how fine they`ll be 
When you`ve cooked `em up for dinner, one for you an` one for me?" 
But Ma just turned her nose up high, an` said when she had seen `em, 
"You`ll never live to eat `em if you wait for me to clean `em."
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