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Edgar Guest - Ma And Her Checkbook
Work rating: Low

Ma has a dandy little book that`s full of narrow
    slips,
  An` when she wants to pay a bill a page from
    it she rips;
  She just writes in the dollars and the cents and
    signs her name
  An` that`s as good as money, though it doesn`t
    look the same.
  When she wants another bonnet or some
    feathers for her neck,
  She promptly goes an` gets `em, an` she writes
    another check.
  I don`t just understand it, but I know she
    sputters when
  Pa says to her at supper:  "Well!  You`re
    overdrawn again!"

  Ma`s not a business woman, she is much too
    kind of heart
  To squabble over pennies or to play a selfish
    part,
  An` when someone asks for money, she`s not
    one to stop an` think
  Of a little piece of paper an` the cost of pen
    an` ink.
  She just tells him very sweetly if he`ll only
    wait a bit
  An` be seated in the parlor, she will write a
    check for it.
  She can write one out for twenty just as easily
    as ten,
  An` forgets that Pa may grumble:  "Well,
    you`re overdrawn again!"

  Pa says it looks as though he`ll have to start in
    workin` nights
  To gather in the money for the checks that
    mother writes.
  He says that every morning when he`s summoned
    to the phone,
  He`s afraid the bank is calling to make mother`s
    shortage known.
  He tells his friends if ever anything our fortune
    wrecks
  They can trace it to the moment mother started
    writing checks.
  He`s got so that he trembles when he sees her
    fountain pen
  An` he mutters:  "Do be careful!  You`ll be
    overdrawn again!"
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