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Edgar Guest - When Father Played BaseballEdgar Guest - When Father Played Baseball
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The smell of arnica is strong,     And mother`s time is spent In rubbing father`s arms and back     With burning liniment. The house is like a druggist`s shop;     Strong odors fill the hall, And day and night we hear him groan,     Since father played baseball. He`s forty past, but he declared     That he was young as ever; And in his youth, he said, he was     A baseball player clever. So when the business men arranged     A game, they came to call On dad and asked him if he thought     That he could play baseball. "I haven`t played in fifteen years,     Said father, "but I know That I can stop the grounders hot,     And I can make the throw. I used to play a corking game;     The curves, I know them all; And you can count on me, you bet,     To join your game of ball." On Saturday the game was played,     And all of us were there; Dad borrowed an old uniform,     That Casey used to wear. He paid three dollars for a glove,     Wore spikes to save a fall He had the make-up on all right,     When father played baseball. At second base they stationed him;     A liner came his way; Dad tried to stop it with his knee,     And missed a double play. He threw into the bleachers twice,     He let a pop fly fall; Oh, we were all ashamed of him,     When father played baseball. He tried to run, but tripped and fell,     He tried to take a throw; It put three fingers out of joint,     And father let it go. He stopped a grounder with his face;     Was spiked, nor was that all; It looked to us like suicide,     When father played baseball. At last he limped away, and now     He suffers in disgrace; His arms are bathed in liniment;     Court plaster hides his face. He says his back is breaking, and     His legs won`t move at all; It made a wreck of father when     He tried to play baseball. The smell of arnica abounds;     He hobbles with a cane; A row of blisters mar his hands;     He is in constant pain. But lame and weak as father is,     He swears he`ll lick us all If we dare even speak about     The day he played baseball.
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