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Robert Burns - To A Louse
Work rating: Medium

On Seeing One on a Lady`s Bonnet at Church

Ha! whare ye gaun` ye crowlin ferlie?
Your impudence protects you sairly;
I canna say but ye strunt rarely
     Owre gauze and lace,
Tho faith! I fear ye dine but sparely
     On sic a place.

Ye ugly, creepin, blastit wonner,
Detested, shunn`d by saunt an sinner,
How daur ye set your fit upon her—-
     Sae fine a lady!
Gae somewhere else and seek your dinner
     On some poor body.

Swith! in some beggar`s hauffet squattle;
There ye may creep, and sprawl, and sprattle;
Wi` ither kindred, jumping cattle;
     In shoals and nations;
Whare horn nor bane ne`er daur unsettle
     Your thick plantations.

Now haud you there! ye`re out o` sight,
Below the fatt`rils, snug an tight,
Na, faith ye yet! ye`ll no be right,
     Till ye`ve got on it—-
The vera tapmost, tow`rin height
     O` Miss`s bonnet.

My sooth! right bauld ye set your nose out,
As plump an grey as onie grozet:
O for some rank, mercurial rozet,
     Or fell, red smeddum,
I`d gie you sic a hearty dose o`t,
     Wad dress your droddum!

I wad na been surpris`d to spy
You on an auld wife`s flainen toy
Or aiblins some bit duddie boy,
     On`s wyliecoat;
But Miss`s fine Lunardi! fye!
     How daur ye do`t?

O Jeany, dinna toss your head,
An set your beauties a` abread!
Ye little ken what cursed speed
     The blastie`s makin!
Thae winks an finger-ends, I dread,
     Are notice takin!

O wad some Power the giftie gie us
To see oursels as ithers see us!
It wad frae monie a blunder free us
     An foolish notion:
What airs in dress an gait wad lea`es us,
     An ev`n devotion!
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